Invisible Disability And A Turnstile

I'm about to post a non computer game issue. If you want you to skip this then feel free, but I need to vent because I want to get it off my chest before tomorrow. I'm on my way to sunny Yorkshire for a very good friends' wedding, which I've been excited and apprehensive about.

As many know,my physical   health has not been great, with a potential Lupus diagnosis in the offing, and Fybromyalga. The long and the short is that I'm in pain all the time, which gets worse and more severe when I have to do stressful or physical things. So travel from Kent to Yorkshire was going to be a stressful experience, so MrMe and I planned this carefully, plenty of time for changes and reservations when it was possible. MrMe is a bit poorly today and his back is playing up, but the gentlechap he is he has my case and his backpack. I had to make a coffee stop, since I need to make it Yorkshire without falling over, so cue Starbucks. Yumyum.

We got to Kings Cross fine, and I found Starbucks and bought a coffee, laughed at the queue of people wanting platform 9 3/4 photos. So now I have to navigate the turnstiles, with two biggish bags, a hot coffee and tickets. I can't carry much in my left hand, and I certainly don't trust it with a coffee, since it cramps randomly and drops things. The ticket thing has its slot on the right.

Do you see the problem?

MrMe has gone ahead, I don't want to overload him anymore as he is struggling too. I think to myself "Time to get over the British insecurity of asking for help when I need it" That's what the staff at ticket barriers are for, after all. Two of my friends work at South East Trains, and the trains are rubbish, but the staff are super helpful in the stations. This morning I saw one staff gent help a lady with her pushchair down the stairs at Gillingham whilst explaining how to get to her destination.

So I ask for help, all I want is for one of the gaggle of three to check my ticket and open the barrier so I can waddle through. It must have been a really interesting conversation between her and her two colleagues, because they ignored me for what felt forever. I coughed it that polite British way, and still no dice. Buggeration. So I did the "Excuse me?" The universal call of the stranded. Well, bloody hell, if I was a lesser lass the woman's dirty look would have mad me skittle off ashamed for disturbing her conversation. But not today, I'm tired and I hurt all over and I'm really quite cranky*. My left hand is starting to cramp trying to hold my wallet and my ticket. "Could you help me through the barrier please?"

"What help do you need" while she looks at me like I smell of doggie poop.

WTF help do you think I need, I think.

"Errr, my hands are full?!?" I reply sheepily,  thinking I've committed some grievous faux par of train travel.

I'd have thought the tired haggard look on my face, the fact I limp plus the fact I'm a customer would have been enough. I'm on this side of the barrier, and I need to be on the other. Here is my ticket of passage, I require your assistance to facilitate the transition.

The extent of the help?

She turned the ticket round in my left hand and pointed at the barrier.

I looked at the barrier, back to her, but she had gone back to her conversation with her back to me again.

With some creative personal origami I got to the train and sat down. I was angry, and a little humiliated by the whole thing. I don't have a crutch or a wheelchair, nor any major external indication that I'm struggling. Why was I made to feel so stupid and silly for asking for a tiny amount of help to make my journey a little easier.

I have a number of friends in the invisible disability team, who are worse than me by a long way, it's an issue I'm acutely aware of. I'm made of sterner stuff than most, so I can imagine that if I'm a little cross, someone else could be quite upset. No one should be made to feel like dog do for asking someone for help, especially when it's that persons job. A few people I know have messages me with similar stories, so it's not an isolated inn dent. So this is an open letter to East Coast Train to give their staff some equality training and and a reasonable apologise to all disabled people, pregnant, little people etc who have been made to feel awful for asking for help.

As an aside, the chap next to me is having issues because the previous one was cancelled and he want to claim back some money. Sounds like they'd wiggle out of that too.

EDIT: As of today (5/6/13) I have not heard a dickybird from East Coast Trains. I am not surprised. So off I go to poke them again. The good news is that it didn't ruin the weekend, and I got back to KX with little trouble by just avoiding any issues by planning ahead!


 * London is full of entitled twits at lunchtime, who are far too important to look where they are going.

To the Airwaves, AWAY!

I recorded my first ever pod cast on Monday night. Fun on the whole but quite nerve wrecking. It didn't help I was a bit tired, and suffering Monster Rehab rage*. Recording has been something I've pondered doing before, but been far too chicken. I think I'll build a little confidence and perhaps do my own thing in a few years with Kitty and Wyrdness, probably with some ironic name like "Shrink it and Pink It" as so many companies seem to think that's how we woman want gadgets (Honestly, pink is a nasty colour!)

Anyhow, it should be on iTunes tomorrow so I am quite apprehensive today. I'm really honoured to be invited on by @RobbieRoo28 and @Fen_man to talk on the MGP Night shift. Of course the black dog of StupidBrain raises its head, tells me I'm rubbish and that I will never talk on a pod cast ever again. Won't be able to listen to it myself because I'll be convinced that I'll sound like a retard, which is a shame, because on the whole the pod cast and its siblings are awesome. They talk about awesome things, have a fantastically active community and are generally good fun.

On the other hand, the game I'm designing resolves around that black dog, its become that much a part of who I am. It comes and goes, being a little irritating chiwawa to a giant slobbering St Bernard to a dangerous Rottie who has just lost a fight with a wasp.** Talking about my game was a scary thing. TBH its not something I've discussed with a lot of people, because I worried about the reception. Although I have the plot and structure straight in my head, I've yet to commit it to paper or consider the format. And if I decide to go down certain routes there is the cost implication.




* I think I'll never drink it again, it seems to give me really bad temper issues whenever I drink it. Which is a shame because it tastes so nice.

** Remember, kiddies, there is no such thing as a bad dog, just bad owners.

Best Spectrum Games

This is my list of best Spectrum games. Just type "Best Spectrum Games" into Google and you'll get loads of other lists, but since this is my blog you can all sit down and shut up.


Sabre Wulf

Rebel Star

Starquake

Wheelie

Chaos

Head Over Heels

Batman 3D

Jet Set Willy

Kokoton Wilf

Special Mention For Being Awesome

All the Dizzy games

Special Mention For Being Ballbreakingly Hard (even though I have none!)

Soul of a Robot

Special Mention For Being Banned In Our House

Daley Thompson Decathlon 

You all know this one. If you owned a Spectrum in the '80s then you almost certainly had this game. It was banned in our house (or rather my grandparents) because my Grandfather was sick of having to fix the joystick and 'n' and 'm' keys when Lil'Sis and I busted it. Ah fond memories.  

Now when I play Kinect Sports and I'm flailing around like a loon in various events and failing to get anywhere, I just think of this. Then KS doesn't seem so bad.